Getting to Know Me

Precious, Precious Girls.
First off, I just want you to know that I love you all dearly. If any of you need me, feel free to Facebook me, text or call me, or e-mail/snail mail. This blog is for you, so if you have any questions, feel free to ask.

I just want to share my life with you guys, so that you will know everything.

I was saved when I was 5. I've gone through a lot in my short life. I often feel like all I've done is attend funerals. But, I'm getting side tracked. Okay. So I grew up in a Christian home. My parents are wonderful, although, at times, I feel the pressure to be perfect.I only have one grandparent left. That was always a struggle for me. Because I would have to hear everyone talk about their grandparents, and it seemed like the only one I had left didn't really even want me. When I was in the 4th or 5th grade, I was stepped on by a horse. I just went on with my life (after all the bruises healed), but the more active I got playing softball and basketball, the more it hurt. So, the summer of my sophomore year, and the December of my sophomore year, I had 2 surgeries. Well, having to quit playing sports, feeling sorry for myself, and not changing my diet caused me to gain a lot of weight. A struggle I honestly still have a hard time with that. I'm disappointed in myself, I don't view myself as beautiful, and I don't love myself a lot of the time. However, I'm working on losing weight, and praying through it. God truly has compassion and wants to heal us. I never fit in in junior high or high school. No one ever really paid me attention. I had to work through being content with the fact that I was set apart. I got left out. A LOT. I felt inadequate. A LOT. I wondered what was wrong with me and I got very very discouraged.. February 1, junior year, a friend/classmate died in a drunk driving accident. That hit everyone hard and rocked my faith. However, the thing that rocked me most was June 14th, when Whitten died. It was just hard to accept that because I had been told my entire life that God was a God of miracles, and I prayed EVERY DAY for a miracle, and He didn't answer yes to that prayer. Girls, let me tell you that I was very angry at God, and I didn't have a very good relationship with Him at all, for nearly 2 years.. It's hard for me to admit this because I know it may let a few of you down.. Well this last semester I came to college, and a senior girl complete ripped me apart. S The combination of that and being very far away from God resulted in deep depression. I wasn't myself. The Godly relationship Jeremy and I had turned into a relationship we were only in for the physicality, like kissing (BAD IDEA). We fought a lot. I felt worthless a lot. But God showed me that there is true redemption. We are redeemed and we are washed, white as snow! Girls, I've been through almost everything you're going through and I want to support you! I love you so very much.